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Teen Survival Guide

Home : Teen Survival Guide : Taking charge of your world

Peer pressure and how to say no

two girls who are friends

Have your friends ever asked you to do something that you really didn't want to do—like maybe cheating on your homework, cutting class, or making fun of someone? Or maybe they've asked you to try cigarettes, drugs, or alcohol? Some friends might even push you to be closer than you want to be. Good friends can handle it when you say, "No." But some people will pressure you to go along.

Be ready to handle peer pressure. Try these ideas when you're put on the spot:

  • Just say, "No thanks." Stand up straight and make eye contact. This sends the message, "I really mean it. Don't ask me again!"
  • Find an excuse to leave. "My parents said I have to be home by 9:30" or "I have to baby sit my brother this afternoon."
  • Stand up to peer pressure. Try one of these lines:
    • "I feel really weird about this."
    • "This makes me feel uncomfortable."
    • "I don't think we should do this."
    • "Are you guys crazy?"
    • "My parents will kill me if they find out."

Teen tip: Think ahead! Don't put yourself in an unsafe or hard situation. You are less likely to have to say no if you hang out with friends who don't smoke, drink, or do drugs, and make other good choices.

girl talking to adult woman

You may be surprised by how many of your friends feel the same way you do.

  • Ask for help from friends or an adult if someone keeps pressuring you.
  • Have a code that you can use when calling your parents or guardians to pick you up if you ever feel uneasy somewhere.

Flashback!

Think back to a time when you gave into peer pressure (c'mon, admit it!)

Why did you go along?

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How did you feel?

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Use the tips listed here to come up with a better way you could have handled the pressure.

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To: girlshealth.gov
From: Bethany (age 12), Shreveport, Louisiana

It seems like everyone I know is using makeup. But I don't want to. Why do I feel like I have to wear eye shadow and lipstick to fit in?

When you feel like you have to act or dress a certain way because everyone else is doing it, that's called "unspoken pressure." It's okay to follow a trend, but being yourself is also cool.

 

Content last updated February 12, 2008

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Office on Women's Health.

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