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Is your daughter a bully?

Bully Parents

Because girls tend to bully in less obvious ways than boys, it is often hard to determine if your daughter is a bully. Talk to your daughter regularly and be on the lookout for signs of bullying, such as suddenly dropping a close friend.

A bully often:

  • seeks to dominate and/or manipulate others
  • enjoys feeling powerful and in control (whether real or not)
  • seems to get satisfaction from other’s fears, discomfort, or pain
  • is good at hiding behaviors or doing them where adults can’t notice
  • is excited by conflicts between others
  • blames others for his/her problems
  • displays intolerance and prejudice towards others
  • lacks empathy towards others

If you think your daughter is a bully…

  • Tell her that bullying is NOT acceptable behavior.
  • Tell her the penalties for bullying and be sure that you enforce them fairly and consistently.
  • Help her learn other ways to deal with anger and frustration.
  • Teach and reward better behavior.
  • Work out a way for her to apologize for the bullying.
  • Help her to understand how her bullying has affected the person who has been bullied.
  • Seek help or counseling if the bullying does not stop.
  • If contacted by the school, stay calm; try not to become angry and defensive. Make an effort to really listen. Keep in mind, this is about the well-being of your child.

Talk to your daughter.
Is your daughter being bullied?


Content last reviewed April 15, 2014
Page last updated October 31, 2013