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Illness & Disability

Home Illness & Disability Do you know someone with an illness or disability? How to be a good friend to people with illnesses and disabilities

How to be a good friend to people with illnesses and disabilities

Treat a friend with a disability or illness just like you would any other friend. Your friend may want to talk about their condition; then again, your friend may not. You can let them know you care by telling them you will listen any time they feel like talking.

Here are some tips:

• You can offer help but ask first. Or wait for your friend to ask for help.
• It's okay to ask friends or classmates about their illnesses or disabilities. But don't be offended if your friend doesn't want to talk about it.
• Just because people use wheelchairs, it doesn't mean they are sick. Many people who use wheelchairs are otherwise healthy and strong.
• When you're talking with a friend in a wheelchair, try to come down to his or her level — kneel down or pull up a chair.
• Don't lean on a wheelchair or touch it without asking.
• It's okay to use words like "see", "hear", "walk," and "run" when you're talking with friends who have disabilities.
• It's okay to ask people who have speech problems to repeat what they said if you didn't understand the first time. You can also try repeating what you think they said and they can reply "yes" or "no."
• If you're talking with someone who has a speech problem, try to ask questions that require only short answers or a nod of the head.
• If an interpreter is helping you speak to a deaf person, talk to the deaf person, not the interpreter.
• Don't speak loudly when talking to blind people. They hear as well as you do.
• Don't pet or play with Seeing Eye® or service dogs without first asking the owner if it’s okay.
• Don't be afraid to ask questions if you are unsure of how to act.
• Invite friends or classmates with illnesses or disabilities to sleepovers, play dates, and birthday parties. Think about ways to make sure they can be included in the things that you do.
• Ask your parents not to park in places reserved for people with disabilities.
• When you go to restaurants and shopping malls, check to see if a friend with an illness or disability could be there with you. If not, you can be a good friend by asking the manager to put in ramps, get raised numbers for the elevators, or have Braille menus printed.
• Treat a classmate or friend with an illness or disability the same way you would like to be treated and you will have a friend for life!

Adapted from: Friends Who Care, Easter Seals Disability Services

Language to use when talking about people with disabilities

When writing or speaking about people with disabilities, always put the person first. Here are some examples:

Content last updated October 21, 2009

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